One against two becomes two plus one

Seeing Fuller interact with his cousins is always an interesting byproduct of our visits with Damon's side of the family.

Vivian and Nick are older (ages 6 and 4, respectively) and interact with each other every day. Watching them together I see they are comfortable wrestling, engage in old fashioned sibling rivalry, and of course know which buttons to push to get a reaction. They also have their moments of whispers and comfortable silence, just existing next to each other.

Add in another kid, younger and not as mentally adept to the unwritten rules of childhood, and mayhem can blossom faster than cooking scrambled eggs. The concept of sharing is repeated several times. Apologies and hugs are interspersed with laughter and delightful shrieking. Building block towers and playing chase punctuate the fall morning.

I giggled when Nick and Vivian tried to band together and push Fuller's buttons in ways that would normally get a rise from each other. Fuller just continues to play cars or blocks, not knowing someone is trying to push any buttons what so ever. Choruses of "na na na na boo boo" fall deaf on my son's ear.

They don't say it out loud, but their body language wonders, "How exactly do we interact with this redheaded cousin?" And Fuller just wanders up to them (Nick especially) and asks to play cars. If they don't want to, he just does his own thing.

We have been creating activities open to them all, structure among the mayhem, so they can have a chance to see the abilities of each other. "See how Vivian writes, Fuller?" "Well, Fuller can't do that yet, he is only three." As the minutes turn to hours and the hours into days, the interaction of the cousins will change. Fuller will realize his buttons are being pushed (and he might actually push back) and they can all find a balance where playing together doesn't have to be structured by the grown ups.

And that's a Thanksgiving byproduct I look forward to.