... I'd Start a Company that Builds Geodesic Domes

The Context
Alli and I were talking the other day about the different preconceived notions we have about raising children. She was sort-of hinting that I have a lot more "requirements" about Fuller's childhood than she does. In response, I pointed out that there are really only 3 unique things that have to (at least until he’s old enough to rebel against us –Ingrate!) be part of Fuller’s life: Auburn University, Spider-man, and the geodesic dome.

It’s the last of these that is probably the hardest to sneak into Fuller’s life right now. Wal-Mart doesn’t sell too many Buckminster Fuller sneakers or geodesic dome sweatshirts, so I figured I have to create my own special something.

My Own Special Something
So I decided to construct a geodesic dome that could either fit over his ExerSaucer or could be used as a climbing apparatus.

I went online and found a site that has a nifty geodesic dome calculator. I entered the ExerSaucer’s radius and the calculator provided me with the strut measurements of a “2V” dome. I estimated that I’d need about 40 feet of plastic pipe, some zip ties, pipe insulation, and a roll of duct tape. Lowes was more than happy to provide me with the stuff I needed.

It was cold outside. I mean REAL cold. You might have heard about the ice storm that blanketed the southeast in late January. Well, my front porch wasn’t blanketed, so I moved my miter saw stand (with vise) onto the front porch and bundled up in my winter coveralls I got for Christmas one year.

The first step was cutting the plastic pipe. When we started remodeling our house, one of our first purchases was this nifty red plastic pipe cutter. It’s wonderful. If you’re going to cut any plastic pipe sometime in your life, you’ll need this tool. It’s much better than using a saw. It made cutting 65 sections of plastic pipe a breeze. Alli also discovered that it’s useful as a cigar trimmer.

After a 5 minutes warm-up-break, I set about flattening the ends of the pipe sections. I used a heat gun to soften up the ends of the pipe. Anyone melting PVC (or in this case, CPVC) should be careful. Burning PVC releases hydrogen chloride and some other toxic gases, so it’s important to soften the plastic, and NOT burn it. This is why I choose to work in a well-ventilated (albeit cold) area. Someday, I'll be diagnosed with lung cancer because of this, and Fuller probably won't even remember this thing (Ingrate!).

Once the end of the section was soft, I squeezed it flat in the vise, left it to cool, and began softening the next segment. This process continued for the next hour-or-so (including 2 more warm-up-breaks) until I had flattened the ends on all 65 pipe sections.

Now I set about drilling holes in the flattened ends. I chucked in my drill bit and started drilling. It was a bit tricky holding the pipe down while drilling. As the bit penetrated the pipe, it grabbed the pipe and screwed the pipe up the drill bit until the pipe struck the drill chuck. This violent impact cracked several of the pipe ends. I quickly realized that I needed to drill these hole on a drill press. Fortunately, I have a drill press. So, after making a few replacement pipe sections, I was able to drill holes in all the end pieces.

Now I could bring my materials indoors. Alli and I watched Ocean’s Eleven while I assembled the dome. Piece-by-piece, the dome fit together and took shape. It was really interesting to see how sections on one side of the dome would “pop” into shape when I tightened up a joint on the far side.

At about the point in O11 where Matt Damon appears on screen, I had assembled the dome. I used pliers to tighten up the zip ties and then clipped off the excess ends. The corners were a little too sharp, so I cut sections of pipe insulation and duct taped them around the joints. By the time George Clooney got out of jail, I was finished.

Now Fuller has his own toddler-sized set of monkey bars. He hasn’t thanked us yet (Ingrate!) but I know he appreciates it. Also, I bet there’s some part of his brain that’s gonna be more developed than yours or mine. (Well, at least yours. I mean, I built the thing. That's gotta say something about my brain.)